Advertisers:
DrPsychotic.com
will
not take responsibility for any ads placed on our site by
our
advertisers. In other
words, let’s say we display a banner ad for a certain restaurant chain
and
you go have some of the fine seafood dishes listed on their menu.
But then you suddenly find it running through you like water through a
screen. Uh oh, you have
food poisoning! Well it’s
not our fault. Are we
supposed to be there to taste it for you?
Why don’t we just pay the bill when you’re done too?
Why not even pay for the gas you use while driving on your way to
the place? Hey, we could
even send your kids through college!
Jokes:
Any jokes we make or
attempt are not directed towards any specific individual or group.
Nor are they intended to cause severe emotional distress.
Let’s say we make a joke about pottery (chose that subject at
random) and you say: “My father was a potter and he was killed when
his kiln exploded”, then you suddenly burst into tears and start
sobbing like your little heart has been broken.
Well we didn’t kill him! We
didn’t even make the pottery that was in the kiln and we weren’t
even present when it blew up! We didn’t even know the guy!
Characters:
Not one character
presented on this site is intended to bear any likeness to any
individual known to man. No
matter how coincidental any likeness may be to someone you know or love.
Let’s say that we have a cartoon character that's chubby and he
looks a lot like your Uncle George.
Or should we use the more politically correct term for chubby?
Like pleasantly plump, big boned or jolly?
Okay, let’s say that the aforementioned jolly looking fellow
bears a remarkable resemblance to your very fat and unsightly Uncle George.
Then you get all upset because your Uncle George recently choked
to death while mulching on a twelve-foot sub. So
what if he choked on it!
It
wasn't our fault!
We
didn’t even know the guy, and he was obviously in poor health due to
his obesity. He should have taken human bites!
I
mean, why didn't you put the sub in a trough so he could have eaten it
like a real pig? But please accept our
condolences anyway.
Even
if
it’s not our
fault. Which it isn't.
Columns:
Some of our columns have
mock (that means fake) letters contained within them, presented only
for comedic value. We wouldn’t want you to get all upset and break down because
your faith in mankind was shattered due to the fact that we presented a
letter that wasn’t real. Relax,
it’s not that big a deal!
Insults
to your intelligence:
We apologize for any article, feature or
joke contained within this site that may appear to be an insult to
your intelligence. Our
occasional condescending tone, pitiful attempts at humor and poor usage
of the English language, are merely by-products of our general lack of
upbringing.
Value:
We make absolutely no guarantees of satisfaction regarding the
quality, usefulness, or value of any information contained on our site. We can at least say that,
in all likelihood, the information is probably worthless.
Closing
statement:
I hope that we have covered ourselves enough to effectively ward
off any potential lawsuit filed by anyone out to make a quick buck.
Or even a slow buck, due to lengthy litigation.
You’ll just have to work for a living like the rest of us!
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